Democratic Accountability

 A spoof on what passes for democracy in a capitalist universe.

Historically,  Democratic Accountability denoted the obligation of those who govern to respond to the electorate either directly - through the ballot-box - or indirectly through congressional or parliamentary procedures.
    The phrase has retained its traditional meaning in the formal discourse of politicians and sections of the media. Elsewhere - and notably in the corporate sector - it refers to the rendering of accounts by politicians to those who provide funds to their party or to their electoral campaigns.
    Once considered scandalous, the practice was redefined in a famous paper by Professor Hiram B. von Schuchenfeld[1]  in which he showed that in a free society, where goods and services of every conceivable kind should be available for sale, it was illogical to  make an exception of democracy.  People should be at liberty, he argued, to spend as much money as they liked on the political party of their choice and to receive a return on their investment. Preventing them from doing so made a mockery of the democratic process. Schuchenfelt’s ideas encountered fierce opposition from rank-and-file sectors of the populace but gained wide acceptance where it counted most -  from corporations and the better-off. In 2035, after a period of tussle between the two contending groups, restrictions against the privatization of political parties were lifted; and all the major league parties duly incorporated. They now operate openly as businesses, serving - or promising to serve - the electorate as customers, while working to satisfy the demands of shareholders and financiers.
    Schuchenfelt went on to become the highest-paid corporate consultant in the history of the profession. Several of his aphorisms have entered the public lexicon, perhaps the most famous of which is: “What you can’t buy ain’t worth voting for”.

[1] H.B von Schuchenfeld: Is Democracy Democratic?, NRA Press,  Spartanburg, 2022.

Note: This is an extract from a book I wrote some years ago. It seems ever more relevant...